It is so hard to trust God sometimes, isn’t it? Faith. Doubt. Peace. Fear.
This has been the continual topic of conversation lately between God’s heart and mine.
A couple of days ago, I was doing more listening than talking and God reminded me that human beings interpret the character of others through the eyes of their own integrity. If a man has a deceitful, scheming heart he will be wary that others are the same. If a woman smiles and waves to her neighbor while thinking malicious thoughts she will forever maintain a wall of protection around her own heart, and what might have been a close, rewarding friendship will end before it could begin.
That is why we don’t trust God. We make determinations about His character based on our own weaknesses. We know that we sometimes fail to provide for those we love. We all can remember some moment when we broke a promise out of our own selfishness. Even when we love well, we hurt those we love so we keep God at a distance watching and waiting for the moment He will abandon us, fail us…refuse to answer our cry when we need Him most.
But God is not like man that He should lie. (Numbers 23:19)
He is not like us. Such a simple truth, but it is such a long journey from our heads to our hearts.
Not long ago, God was so gracious to give me a verse of scripture for the next stage of my life. It was His proclamation of what was to come and His sweet promise that He would be with me all the way. Get ready now child. Things are about to change…..
I was so excited when the words leapt off the page. I have since discovered there is a fine line between excitement and abject terror.
This was God’s message to me:
“I will lead the blind by ways they have not known,
along unfamiliar paths I will guide them;
I will turn the darkness into light before them
and make the rough places smooth.
These are the things I will do;
I will not forsake them.” Isaiah 42:16
Can I just say that it is terrifying for a blind person to go down an unfamiliar path?
Here is the thing, when God begins to lead us into the leaden night down a way we have never gone before, we want Him to let us in on the plan. We want Him to spell out in the beginning just how He is going to take care of it all.
And guess what? That is not trust. See, the reason we want the details because we are not so sure He is going to deliver us.
But…..God does not illuminate the entire path. He just makes the darkness light before us. He gives enough light for the next step, and then the next, and then the next……
Trusting Him for the light we have not yet received….that is true faith.
“God is not a man, that he should lie,
nor a son of man, that he should change his mind.
Does he speak and then not act?
Does he promise and not fulfill?” Numbers 23:19